Saturday, January 21, 2023

Of Nightmares & Joys

It's been a dreary couple of weeks here in New England. No snow (which is a big disappointment to this here winter lover), lots of rain, and basically bleak.

Inside and outside. 

A small part of my personal life is, once again, in serious upheaval. Draining emotional issues that leave me numb and useless. It is times like these that we should turn to God. Yet my perfectly formed little human ego - makes that a huge challenge for me.


We doubt your goodness

We doubt your love

As if every promise from your word 

is not enough

Doubt. Such a human thing to do. Even as I pray ceaselessly, I doubt.

Is God listening? Does he hear my "desperate pleas"? Does he even care? 

But he is there always. And those blessings as well. They do abound no matter what else is going on around us. Yet when those other things leave us feeling disoriented - as if our very soul has fractured into a million tiny pieces - God is still there.

Even if we don't feel him, hear him, or even worse, acknowledge him.

What if trials of this life

The rain, the storms,

The hardest nights, are your mercies

in disguise.

God is there. In our nightmares, our worries, our fears, our anguish. In our joys, our laughter, our happiest moments.

God is there.

Always.

Blessing us no matter what we think or feel.

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